Saturday, March 12, 2016

Yu Never Noe

(Noet: This poest iz Fanetisìezd WITTHOUT aaksents faur silaabik stres. If yu haav a prefrans reegording tekst witth aaksents aur witthout, pleez let me noe yaur tthingking vea eemail tu fanetiks@aol.com.)

I haav menshand tha Nuark diaaspara on mene akaezhanz, esp. in kanekshan witth foetoez uv ouar loekal snoez, in thaat mene faurmer Nuarkerz haav taekan tha hint aand hedad tu snoelas kliemz.
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Hwut I haadan't kansiderd iz tha jeneraeshanz thaat proeseedad frum peepool hu left Nuark, faur hwutever reezan, houwever laung ago. Then I got this eemail 3½ muntths ago, on Noevember 30tth, 2015.
Just wontad tu giv yu a tthaangk yu frum out uv tha blu.
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Beekauz uv yaur blog on fiurhouzaz in Nuark I wuz aebool tu loekaet tha preesies spot in aan oeld foeto (ataacht) uv mi fother (on tha left) aand hiz frend frum about 1945. It took a lot uv internet serching but yaur foetoez uv Enjin 10 aat Aastar St. aand Sherman Aav. iedentified tha loekaeshan perfaktle. Mi fother livd aat 172 Seemur Aav. aat tha tiem, hwich izan't for frum this fiurhous. Mi sinseerast graatitued.
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Robert Florczak [pranounst fláur.zaak], Laus Aanjalas

Thair apeerz tu be a sigaret haanging frum the elder Flaurzaak'z moutth. I hoep that duz not faurshaado a preemachuer detth frum lung kaanser. [I need tu adres this, in boetth tha kanvenshanale-speld aand Fanetik vershanz uv this poest, w/updaetad info frum Robert] I woch a lot uv "klaasic" (oeld) T.V. sitkomz, moestle on Aantena T.V. (W.P.I.X. chaanal 11.2), aand sumtiemz go ontu the Internet tu se hou oeld tha vaareas storz wer hwen that died, aand hwut thae died frum. In reegord tu Jone Korsan, faaur instans, Wikipedea sez plaenle thaat he died uv lung kaanser induest bi smoekig, The ortikool menshand thaat he wuz sumtiemz seen smoeking on kaamera, aand I did se aat leest wun episoed in hwich he did indeed need a smoek.
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I wuz aakchuale not kwiet sertan thaat Einjin 10 wuz tha riet fiurhous, beekauz in tha foeto frum tha 1940'z, thair iz sumtthing stiking up much tauler frum tha turat thaan in mi foeto uv Jooli 29, 2011, aaz beelo.


So I zuemd in on mi foeto tu se hwi thaat tthing, hwutever it miet be, wood be shaurter, aand sau this.


Tha raagad j uv the outkroping indikaets thaat in the interveening dekaedz, mene briks haad apaarantle faulen frum hwut I ges wuz a chimne. Mistere solvd.
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I aaskt Robert if I kood yuez hiz tekst aand foeto in this blog. He agreed.
I wood be o.k. witth yu yuezing tha mateereal, Kreg, but just tu understaand, or yu tauking about tha foeto uv mi fother aand hiz frend? If so, mi fother'z naem wuz Henre Flaurzaak (on tha left) aand hiz frend wuz Lu Wiesberg. I bileev tha foeto wuz taekan in 1945 aur '46, posible hwen mi fother wuz on leev frum tha Mareenz. I bileev hiz hoem aat 172 Seemaur Aav. in thoez daez no laungger egzists, aur haaz bin raezd aand reeplaest. Aaz faur me, mi fool naem shood be yuezd (I aam sumhwut in tha publik ie)— Robert Flaurzaak—uv Laus Aanjalas ....
Robert iz apaarantle aan ortist aand orts ejookaeter, jujing frum hiz websiet, lingk tu hwich he inkluedad in hiz eemailz. This iz port uv the inishal infarmaeshan about him on hiz websiet.
Robert Flaurzaak wuz baurn in 1950 in Woshington, D.K. He ernd a Baachaler uv Fien Orts digre frum tha prestijas Kueper Yuenyan in Nu Yaurk Site, studeing paenting under Wil Bornet aand fatografe under Gaare Winagraand(?). Flaurzaak wuz ortist-in-rezidans aat Wiedner(?) Yueniversite, aand taut paenting aat the Ort Instituet uv Filadelfea, tha Laguena Kolaj Uv Ort aand Dizien, aand tha Saan Fransisko Akaadame uv Ort Yueniversite.
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Aaz a prafeshanal ortist, he haaz haad aan aaktiv kareer spaaning faur dekaedz, witth ekstensiv werk in tha fien ort, aadvertiezing, entertaenmant, aand publishing feeldz. Hiz arijinal werks or in tha prievat kalekshanz uv Mel Gibsan, Miekal Jaaksan (inklueding tha loego uv Neverlaand Raanch), Hwoope Goeldberg, Jime Stuart (nou aat tha Jaemz Stuart Ttheater aat Prinstan Yueniversite, aand Paul Aalan (Miekroesauft's koe-founder), amung utherz, aand in tha kaurparate kalekshanz uv A.T.&T., Raandam Hous aand Beecham Formasuetikalz, tu menshan a fyu.
I didan't noe thair wuz a Jaemz Stuart Ttheater aat Prinstan, naur hwi. Hwen I chekt hiz Wikipeedea entre, I found thaat he did indeed atend Prinstan. I miet haav atended Prinstan mieself eksept thaat I wuz so beeset bi Veltshmairts in hi skuel thaat I kood not foekas on sumtthing so triveal aand aport frum tha mizereez uv tha woorld aaz hie-skuel studeez, so mi graedz weran't good eenuf. It's a litool hord faur me tu reegret not geting intu Prinstan, tho, beekauz it iz duering mi ferst yeer aat Site Kolaj uv Nu Yaurk (sekand yeer aat the Site Yueniversite) thaat I kaem up with tha koinaj "Gae Pried", hwich haaz maasivle traansfaurmd tha woorld. Yu never noe hwut it wuz about tha partikyoolar tiem thaat yu did sumtthing thaat maed it kum out az it did. So I didan't get intu Prinstan, but I did chaenj tha woorld. Tue baad I didan't get rich duing so. Thaat wood haav bin nies.
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Aaz tu this abaandand fiurhous, hwi iz this dilaapidaetad strukchur stil staanding? It duz not seem partikyoolarle werthe orkitekchurale naur, asied frum indivijual faamile histareez such aaz thaat uv Robert Flaurzaak (aand iz thaat sed fláur.chaak? [no, just fláur.zaak), partikyoolarle impaurtant histaurikale. Kood tha Site uv Nuark maek sum mune bi seling this abaandand fiurhous aand multituedinas uther esenshale abaandand properteez? Aur iz thair no morkat faur this aand uther such properteez? I shood tthink thair wood be sumbude eeger tu poot up a "Baeyoen boks" hous aur tue heer aand in mene uther Site siets. Thaat wood reedues tha need faur tha Site tu eether raez taaksaz aur redues servisaz, aand bring in maur good peepool tu aad solid sitizanz tu ouar rezidenshal kaur.
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I haav aakchuale wunderd if thair miet be intrast on sumbude'z port in bieing tha haaf uv mi dubool lot thaat mi hous duz not okyoopi, tu poot up a nu Baeyoen boks. If need be, I kood dispens witth mi drievwae, aand pork on tha street, mueving mi kor wuns a week. But tha Site reeviez iz houzing staandard in 2008, tu reekwiur maur ruem beetween houzaz, aand I doen't noe if thair wood be eenuf spaes faur anuther entiur strukchur under tha nu staandard. I aam astoundad thaat tha Site Kounsool wuz indignant about theez seemingle fien adishanz tu tha site'z kaarakter, popyoolaeshan, aand midool-klaas miks. Hwi on ERTTH wood Nuark's site guvernmant wont tu STOP peepool frum mueving heer? Thair or mene kiendz uv stuepidite. Baaning Baeyoen boksaz iz just wun uv them.

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